A WORLD'S AIDS DAY THANK YOU

Today is World’s Aids Day.

Today the goal is “Getting to Zero” (That's zero new HIV infections, zero discrimination and zero AIDS-related deaths).

Today I will honor my friend, Raven, who died of Aids, leaving a gap in my life.

I honor his memory as the first male in my daughter’s young life (then 8 years old) who empowered her. She had been through many challenges and walked with her head and spirit low. In a few minutes of Raven speaking to her, telling her how no man should ever mistreat her, how if any man did so…he, Raven, would be her protector…her shoulders came up and the light in her eyes re-ignited.

As her mother, I had told her all those things, but until she heard it from a man, it did not have the power she needed. She and I were blessed with knowing Raven only a few short years as HIV became full-blown AIDS. She became stronger emotionally each time that she was around him.

My religious friends and family were concerned over my friendship with a gay man with HIV, but I was learning to love people in the way Christ did…no judgments. Raven showed me the love of the Divine and that is all that mattered with me.

We eventually lost contact for some months, but I was able to be by his bedside a couple of days before he left his weakened shell of a body. I thanked him for what he had done. I told him I loved him.

After his funeral, part Lutheran and part Native American, (he was half Cherokee) there was a beautiful bonfire and drumming. I was dealing with my own grief and chatted with a friend of his that I just met. (This person led me to my first Reiki Master Teacher whom re-opened my abilities to the Spirit World..Raven did much more for me than help my daughter).

Later as we spoke about the funeral, my daughter said, “Wasn’t it cool how Raven appeared in the fire, turned into a crow and flew into the sky?”From the mouths of babes!

The next night was a full-moon and I had a midnight horseback ride scheduled. On the drive there, I spoke to my friend, Raven. I asked if he wanted to come along on the ride with me.

When I got there, the leaders ‘indiscriminately’ put you on a horse. My gelding was as black as coal and went by the name of Raven!

As we trailed out of the barn in single file there was a commotion behind us. I heard someone say, “Oh never mind. Just let him go.”

Looking behind me I saw a paint horse (Indian pony) walking directly behind my horse. No rider, saddle or bridle! During our trail ride I continued to chat with Raven. I kept trying to get my horse to follow directly behind the one in front. I have had horses and am an experienced rider, but couldn’t get my Raven horse to walk in line like the rest of the horses.

Suddenly I got it! I chuckled and said under my breath, “Raven, you always had to do things a little differently than everyone else!”

Raven shows up from time to time in my life even now. Today I feel his energy more strongly.

Today I honor Raven and will continue to try to show the same Divine unconditional love as he did for so many people!

Thank you, Raven.

MERLYNS MAGICK...Part One

Hooves of Thunder flashing over the plains

Where does it come from, what is to gain?

Eyes of fire and legs of steel,

Mind focused on what is real

As I wrote this, I stopped and remembered. My remembering took me to a life lived many centuries ago. I write it as I remembered and the lesson I was to learn in remembering.

“The day dawned bright and clear. I arose early, stretching the entire length of my body as I stood up outside the tepee. As I looked about the peaceful village a sense of calm pervaded my body. Our chief was wise and powerful and I had placed my confidence in his leadership, as did all the others.

I was a strong young man just coming into my physical prime. Today was to be a special day, the day I was to be announced as a warrior of the tribe.

Many gifts were placed at my feet including spears, shields, sage, tobacco, and knives. The chief was waiting for the last. His gift would be the most important, the most sacred.

The chief approached me and said...”my gift is one that I have considered long and hard. You are to be a great warrior, and someday you may become chief in my place. Come,” he said and motioned for me to follow.

He led me toward the herd of horses. He whistled shrilly, and a fine strong mare lifted her head, neighed, and then trotted to him. I knew this was his prize mare, so I stood there wondering.

Then I heard a little squeaking kind of desperate sound. A yearly colt appeared behind his mother, the mare. The little fellow had just realized his mother had left his side.

He ran up to us, butted his head against his mother, and she turned to kick him away. The look on his face was one of hurt.

“Poor little fellow,” I thought as my heart went out to him. He walked to me and nuzzled my hand, looking at me with trusting eyes. I gently scratched his head and behind his ears, smiling as I observed his look of satisfaction and pleasure.

My chief spoke, breaking me out of the trance I seemed to be in. “That settles it,” he said. “I needed to make sure. He is yours. Train him well, he is strong with a warrior spirit like your own.”

That began our journey together. He became my constant companion. I even quit sleeping in the tepee, choosing instead to sleep outside under the stars with him.

Cataron was the name I choose for him. In a few months we began the transition of training in earnest. He was already used to me lying my body over his back. Cataron seemed to think that was a fine game. At times he would head butt me to get me to do it.

The first day that I sat astride Cataron, we were swimming, one of our favorite pastimes. As he was swimming I slid onto his back and lay close to his neck. He walked out of the water and seemed to notice me, but thought it was another game. I firmly, but gently started guiding him with my knees. From then on his training went quickly.

Yes, in many ways I was his master, but most of all we were friends. We even played a game of tag in the open meadows. We would run and chase each other until exhausted.

We fought many battles together and had a teamwork that amazed the other warriors. One day we were to battle our enemies the Apaches. It became a much fiercer battle than was expected.

Very soon we were in the thick of it. Apaches were coming at us from every side. Arrows were falling all around us. As Cataron reared to stomp out an enemy, I slipped from his back, and fought alongside of him.

I was knocked to my knees and fought hand to hand with a fierce Apache. Then suddenly everything seemed to become in slow motion. As the Apache fell to his death, I looked up to see two arrows coming to me.

I knew in my heart that I had no time to react, and death was coming swiftly my way. As I prepared to go to the Creator I heard a desperate neigh and my stallion appeared in front of me, blocking the arrows of death.

As the first one hit his side he didn't flinch, but stood solid as the next one swiftly followed entering his kidneys and bringing him to his knees. He continued to faithfully take the death that was intended for me.

I fell to my knees, badly wounded myself, and quickly responded by shooting arrows toward our attackers. Then suddenly the area was swarming with our tribe, and forced the enemy to retreat.

I pulled myself to Cataron's side. He was now laying flat on the ground with arrows protruding from all about his withers. I held his head gently on my lap as a mother would hold her newborn.

The tears freely streamed down my face as I spoke gentle love words to him while watching his eyes fixed on my face. His eyes were full of love and trust. I knew in my heart he was aware what he was doing when he blocked the arrows path from me. Now I was to lose my dearest friend and companion.

As I saw his life's spirit leave his tortured body, I cried out. “No! Don’t leave me! Come back, come back to me, I need you!”

Little did I realize the effects this cry of my soul would have on our future together. This story would come later. For now, I buried my friend in a great ceremony, as one would do for a sacred soul.

My wounds eventually healed, but the wound in my heart never did. I believed one day, we would be together again, when the Great Spirit came to take me home.”

Part Two will be tomorrow...about how he returned to me....:-)

Morgana Starr 2002

SPIRIT RUNS FREE

Death. It seems like a sad ending, yet it is truly a new beginning. Those that go before us will be our welcome party to show us the ropes when we walk through to the other side.

After just seeing another pet cross over, I have to remember to be happy that yet another furry face will be there to greet me in the future. Pets teach us much. They teach us about unconditional love and trust. They live shorter lives they we do, so we are also taught how to let go.

One big lesson for me happened many years ago. I have adored horses since I was very young. There was a racing stable near my home and I used to beg my dad to take me there, just so I could walk around smelling the aroma of the horses. I felt such peace amongst the horses.

When my children were 3 and 6, I was blessed to have horses of my own. The way I rewarded myself for completing housework (which I detest), was to go spend time with the horses. Ride, clean stalls, or build fences. It didn’t matter as long as I was with them.

My kids each had their own ponies and I had a 16 hand well-trained black quarter horse. His deep black sheen was accented by a white star on his forehead. He was aptly named Target. He was huge, but gentle as a lamb.

When he first came to live with me, his previous owner said he was stubborn and wouldn’t come when called. She said she would have to chase him down in the pasture and beat him with a whip to catch him.

Not liking what I heard or seeing his ribs outlined on his body, I turned for advice to a good friend whom had trained Arabian horses for years. I followed her advice with Target.

After a short month of going to his pasture, three times a day with sweet grain covered in a bit of corn oil, he would come running to me every time I called him. I would feed him and love on him. He rewarded me by teaching me much about riding and unconditional love. We had great times together. He was so gentle that my 3 year old could walk under him and he would just watch her.

I was blessed to have him in my life. He was a good friend when I was going through some rough times in my marriage. I would spend time running my hands over his face and he would nuzzle me with his velvety nose. He gave me a lot of peace.

However, he was old for a show horse. He developed an issue with his hooves. Each step brought him pain. I began treating him with penicillin shots. The vet used to ride him a few years previous and loved Target too.

Funny thing about penicillin…the vet said that a horse that had been treated many years with penicillin could develop an allergy to it. I was unaware of that when I carefully gave him his last shot in his wooden stall.

He began to go into convulsions. I quickly jumped out to safety…as a 1200 pound horse thrashing uncontrollably in a tight space, was not where I needed to be. He fell to the ground and laid there breathing shallowly. In the next moment I was beside him cradling his sweet head in my lap. I stroked him and told him how loved he was as he watched me, eyes filled with trust and love. In a few minutes, his spirit went through the doorway to beautiful green pastures on the other side.

I called the vet and he came immediately. He explained to me what he thought happened and assured me there had been nothing else I could have done. We sat for awhile reliving pleasant memories of this beautiful horse, crying and laughing together.

My friends who had farm machinery came and helped get his body out of the stall. Since it was winter in Indiana, it would take a lot of digging to bury the body. They left it till the next day.

I looked out my farm house window and saw the body that once held a beautiful spirit. I knew he was no longer there.

That is when I had a vision of Target running to me. His beautiful black hide was glinting in the sun with his mane and tail streaming behind him. I knew without a doubt that he was free to run without pain and he would greet me some day.

Since that time, he has run through my dreams. He also helped me unlock a past life memory when I was a knight with a huge black war stallion that I loved deeply.

Even as I write this, I feel his sweet breath on me and the velvety softness of his nose. Yes…if he was allowed in the house, he would have come inside! LOL! Now he can!

Remember, our pets are blessings…in this life and when they choose to go to the other side. Target can help me in ways that he never could while in his horsey body.

I am blessed to continue to have my furry friends helping me even when they become spirit.